Incest/Taboo A Penny for Your Thoughts

Now all I had to do was come up with a good enough reason for going over there, and visiting with her for a bit. That...and do it when I knew she and I would be all alone. Jenny, my boyhood sweetheart, well sort of anyway...was still in high school and a member of the cheerleading squad. I knew from my own past experiences there, she had practice three days a week. Today was a Friday, so I knew for sure she did, if not actually a game even though I'd lost track of following any of that. Either way, I felt sure we'd be alone.

As far as Jerry's dad went, that was a no brainer now either. Like a lot of people perhaps, Carol and Mike had gone through a rather messy divorce nearly three years ago now. I had to wonder, reconsidering Carol if she hadn't inadvertently contributed to that. Mike had been having an affair with a woman half his age, and once discovered, it was over with. Just like that. Jerry's dad had moved out, and they all got on with their lives as best as they knew how to. Including Carol, who'd now gone back to using her maiden name, though I honestly had no idea what that was. But that too, gave me something else I might be able to use on her as I sat there thinking about what I was going to attempt to do.

Needless to say, it would be a tough one, given I only had the fifteen, maybe twenty minutes I had to work with here. I'd not flicked my Bic for the full twenty four hours needed so to speak, and then grabbed one of my many "Magic Pennies" as I still called them out of the jar in my room, just in case. I didn't recall seeing Carol very often wearing jeans, let alone anything else that might have copper in it, so if nothing else, then the penny would have to do. I then called her, surprising her perhaps, but laid out a story about possibly going to the same university Jerry was attending, or maybe even the one I know she had gone to, graduating from UCLA as Jerry had once told me. I had in fact been working towards doing that, earning the extra money I'd need, saving up for it with the intention of enrolling in the fall. As I'd hoped, Carol was excited, anxious to see me, so I promised to come over that Friday, sit down and visit with her.

As she usually did of course, she met me at the door with a big hug and a kiss. A chaste one of course, usually on the cheek. She invited me inside for a glass of lemonade to go along with our chat of course, and then took our glasses into her informal little sitting area just off the kitchen area where she preferred entertaining. I knew for a fact that Carol didn't do a whole lot of entertaining these days, wondering how long it actually had been for her, since she'd entertained much of anything.

"So...Mrs, Ms...gee, what do I call you these days anyway?" I asked trying to sound innocent about it. Jerry told me you'd taken back your maiden name, but I'm not sure he ever told me what that was."

She laughed at that, blushing just a little. "Oh for heaven's sakes Brian, the days of you calling me Mrs. Davis, or now...Ms. Peterson, are long gone. Just call me Carol, I think we're way past formality now, don't you?" I smiled at her nodding my head.

"I'd like to think so," I assured her.

"Now, what can I help you with?" She asked curiously. And of course I then told her I was as yet undecided as to which school I might want to attend, my choices now pared down to where Jerry was going, along with UCLA, where she had herself graduated from, and one other, a bit more Midwest, though that was a long shot the more I'd been thinking about it.

"So...what was it like going to UCLA anyway?" I asked. "I've heard...it's quite the party school," I stated shyly. "Which surprises me, as to why you went there," I then added as I began setting things up. I hadn't as yet "flicked my Bic" of course, not wanting to waste any precious time here, getting the chit-chat out of the way first, setting up the direction I hoped we'd soon be taking before doing that. My Penny, already handy and available for when the time was needed. I had already noticed she wasn't wearing anything with copper in it, so the penny would have to do.

"Well believe it or not Brian, back in my college days, I was actually a bit of a party girl back then. Did some things I'm not exactly proud of now, got into a little trouble for it in fact, nearly getting expelled even. But...I soon after got my act together, changed my ways, buckled down and graduated. And stupidly...got married," she'd added taking a breath, and then looking flustered. "Not that I have any misgivings about getting pregnant, giving birth to Jerry, and later Jenny. Not that...just that, well...you know how it is," she left off saying.

"Yeah I know, and I'm sorry about that. But you Carol? A party girl? I'm having trouble seeing that," I laughed just a little. But she was already lost in thought perhaps, remembering back now.

It was time to flick my Bic. I'd been holding the penny in my hands, and now charged it. I pretended to reach into my pocket as though getting it, and then held out my hand to her. She looked at me.

"Here, open your hand." She did so. I dropped the penny into it, she looked at it, and then at me. "Penny for your thoughts?" I asked.

Almost immediately I got a sense of embarrassment and shame even. Brief fleeting images, a drunken party perhaps, plenty of nude men and women running about, squealing, chasing one another. And then this image of Carol, a much younger Carol, the way she saw herself perhaps, remembering, though even that image tended to flicker back and forth between that one, and the way she actually looked now. She finally snickered a bit. "Oh Brian, I dare not tell you those thoughts," she stated moving about in her chair as though suddenly uncomfortable. "Like I said, I was a different woman...a different girl back then. I did things, like I said, that I shouldn't have." I sat listening, or appearing to however, now slowly worming my way into her thoughts, like a shadow in the back of your mind, whispering to her, using what I saw, what I felt, what I sensed to draw her out more and more.

"It still excites you to think about though," I told her. "Things you did, the pleasures you felt, so long ago now. How long has it really been Carol? Since you've allowed yourself to feel that way again? To experience that kind of exquisite, joyful pleasure? How long? Certainly what you did wasn't that bad now was it? Haven't you made more of it than what it actually was? When are you finally going to let go of that, quit brow-beating yourself with it?" I pressed, now seeing the struggle, sensing the emotions as memories of that time came flooding back to her.

"Oh come on Carol, it can't be that bad. Can't be any worse than some of the things I've done myself, now can it? Doesn't everyone experiment in one way or the other? Try things? Do things? Some of which we may latter regret yes, but isn't that how we learn who we are? I'm sure, knowing you...it isn't half as bad as your making it out to be."

"Oh Brian, seriously honey...you have no idea. I really did do a few things that I regret. Not all of them of course, but some. And yes, you're right, I do sometimes think about those times fondly," she stopped herself looking at me. "You...you did ask me that right?" She suddenly questioned, not at all sure now if I had asked, or if she'd just offered something she shouldn't have.

Like I said, this could get interesting, but I needed to tread carefully here, and we were still on borrowed time as well. I knew then, this might take more than one session to make any real progress with. It might be better to take it slow and easy with her as opposed to trying to force anything too quickly. Though I did decide right there and then to try and plant the suggestion, along with the determination to tell me what happened, seeing me as a friend, someone she could trust, share this long held secret with.

"Go ahead Carol, you can tell him. He'll listen, he'll understand, and he won't judge you, or think ill of you for sharing something with him, something a bit naughty, a bit dirty...about your past. It's ok, he's old enough now, far more mature than his age even. He's always liked you, admired you. Hell, you know deep down inside, he's even been a little bit attracted to you, sometimes hanging around, flirting with you in that little boy way of his he once did. He's your friend...go ahead, tell him. Tell him what you did that you think was so bad. He'll listen, he won't judge. If anything, he'll think it's way cool that you did that."

It was like watching her talking to herself, only it was listening to me, she continued to struggle a bit, weighing the consequences perhaps, and finally...finally...accepting it.

"I can't believe I'm actually going to tell you this Brian, but I think you're old enough now to hear it and not judge me for one thing. But for another, there's no one else I can possibly even image telling this. It's something I've held onto for years, struggled with. But maybe, maybe telling you...telling someone about it, will help me see it in another light."

I sat back, pleased with the progress I had made, though having less than half the time left before the Penny wore out. The penny she still held in her hand like some sort of amulet. Which in a way, it was. But maybe, just maybe...it would be enough. One more prod. "Go ahead Carol, tell him, and don't hold back. Tell him everything, spit it out, don't be afraid. He will understand."

She seemed to settle into it then, finally having made up her mind, with some encouragement from me of course, and began, relaxing in her seat after taking a sip of her lemonade. "Believe it or not Brian, I once belonged to a rather prestigious Sorority. I won't give you the name, as I don't wish to blemish them further with my own wrong doings. But needless to say, it was shortly after my...my misfortune, that I was asked to leave. Something that I have had to live with to this very day."

"Go ahead Carol, tell him. Spit it out, tell him everything, all the gory details. It won't shock him, offend him...you can do it, spill it, you'll feel better." I could feel the energy starting to weaken. The link between us not quite as strong. I relaxed it a little, buying a bit more time, something I'd recently learned how to do. Just barely holding on, no longer able to suggest anything anymore. But perhaps I had done just enough. I could still hear her thoughts, which might help me in redirecting our conversation if I had to.

"I'm not sure you'll want to hear this..."

"I do. No matter what it is you have to say or tell me. I really, really do Carol. I can see that it's something that's been bothering you for quite some time now. Listen, we're friends, just not neighbor's, and least I'd like to think of us as being that. Good friends, close friends, someone you can share a secret with, say something to, and know they won't go out and tell anyone else about it. I'll promise you this Carol, you share yours with me, and I'll tell you a secret I've never told anyone else!"

She actually smiled at that, now grinning, nodding her head. "Ok, just remember I warned you, but I'm going to hold you to your promise to tell me what your secret is afterwards," she stated.

"I promise Carol. I will."

"Still can't believe I'm actually going to tell you this, but ok...here it is Brian. Like I said, back then, I really was a bit of a party girl. Some people might even call me easy, though I'd still like to think it wasn't like that. But I did enjoy doing certain things, admittedly. And I didn't see that as being much worse than anything any of the other girls were doing back then either. So it's not like it was all that bad, even now...I still don't see it as such. Only what happened, what I got more or less trapped into doing, all because of a stupid bet. A bet I lost, and out of some sort of twisted, false pride and vanity perhaps. It was a bet I felt I had to honor and live up to."

"Which was?"

"That I had to blow every single guy in the Fraternity we were associated with, or at least those who were willing to go along with it anyway. Blindfolded mind you, so I wouldn't ever really know who I had...or hadn't. But I did Brian. And I'm ashamed to say it now, but I enjoyed it. I enjoyed every moment of it. Kneeling there naked in this little room, hands tied behind my back. One guy after another coming into the room, the sensation of a different dick perhaps, each one fucking my face." She stopped, obviously surprised with herself, her face deepening in color, even more embarrassed now, realizing she'd just dropped the "F" bomb in front of me. "Oh my god Brian! I got carried away there for a moment, I shouldn't have said that."

"What? Fuck? I happen to like the word, and not in a mean way either. I think it's sexy personally, I like hearing it, saying it...especially when I'm horny. Don't you?"

I had a little bit left, so I used it. "You like hearing it, and saying it too Carol. It's ok, go on, say it...say it. Say fuck!"

"Funny word isn't it? Fuck I mean? It can be so cruel when used certain ways, or hurt people you care about. But yes Brian...there are times when you say it, hear it, of course...do it, when it's just...well, simply put. It's just fucking hot!"

I'd lost my connection. But it had been worth it. And now, it would be interesting to see where things would go from here.

"Yes it is Carol, so...fucking tell me, the rest of the story!" I smiled.

I had made her laugh hearing that, relaxing her even more, though there was still color in her cheeks. Her eyes seemed wider, more alert, her breath a bit quicker perhaps as she once again seemed to squirm in her seat. Not from being uncomfortable, but from something else. There was even a hint of moisture standing out on her forehead now as she wiped it off with her hand, now surprising me, reaching down, undoing the top button on the simple summer dress she was wearing. I honestly saw cleavage now for the very first time since I'd known her.

"Wow...whew, is it hot in here? Or is it me?" She giggled making a joke of it, but she truly was heating up a bit.

"Yeah, I know what you mean, it is sort of hot." Though it was far hotter outside of course. "Wish I could take my shirt off in fact," I said somewhat innocently.

"Go right ahead!" Carol said. "You know that doesn't bother me, seen you with your shirt off more times than I could possibly count," she said almost wistfully. "Just wish I could," she then added, surprising herself. "Even with this light summer dress on, it's almost too hot still."

"Wouldn't bother me any...if you did," I said looking directly at her. "After all, it's your house, and we're just friends sharing secrets right? I'd certainly never tell anyone."

I think she almost would have too. But it was early yet. She laughed the suggestion off, making light of it. But she did undo one more button. So there was that. And I now saw just how lovely her breasts hinted at being, purposely looking at her, letting her know that I was. She even leaned forward a little, finally continuing her story. I left my own shirt on, tempted as I was. But it was a start nevertheless.

"Now...where was I? Oh...yes. I was getting face fucked by the fraternity."

I openly laughed, causing her to do the same, but in such a short brief time, I had seen this sensual, erotic woman begin to emerge from the cocoon she had wrapped herself in, just now starting to emerge.

"Here's the thing Brian," she said suddenly getting serious again, so I did. Listening. "It's hard for me to say this, admit this...but since you asked, and since we're already there anyway, I'll finish it. Back in the day..." she said again smiling, trying to lighten things up a little as the mood had again turned somewhat somber. "I loved the feel, and yes...the taste of most men's cum. So much so, that when I found myself kneeling there like that, having one man after another spurt his cream all over me, all over my face and body...I was in heaven. What I didn't know however, is that someone with a camera had been taking pictures of me. Kneeling there, dripping cum, covered in it. Eventually someone distributed a few of the photos unbeknownst to me. One of them landed on the Deans desk. Naturally, I was called in. I was of course stunned, dumbfounded, though oddly enough, the blindfold I had on obscured my face just enough that the accusation of it, couldn't be supported. I lied Brian. I didn't confess to any of that happening. And without anyone stepping forward who'd actually been there, witnessed it, they had nothing to basically convict me of. The damage was done however, and the compromise became my resigning from the Sorority in order for the entire affair to be dropped after that, and thus keeping me from being expelled from the University."

Carol sat back in her seat now, looking suddenly younger in a strange way. It was obvious, finally sharing, and telling someone that story had relieved a major burden from her. One she'd been carrying around all these years.

"The problem is...well, was anyway Brian...it affected me greatly after that. I was never really the same person after that. I quit partying obviously...but it did something else too. The thing I'd once enjoyed, as decadent or wicked, as I know it sounded, was something I never did again. Not for anyone. Including my own husband Brian. So you see, the ending of our marriage, was just as much my fault as it was his. My refusal to do for him, give him what he wanted and needed, is my fault. I couldn't do it anymore Brian. Not for him, not for anyone. Every time I even considered it, those memories, those horrible images would come racing back. I'd get physically ill, and quite naturally, that would be the end of it."

"I'm sorry Carol, I do understand a lot better now what it was you must have gone through, but it doesn't have to stay that way. Sure...it's something you have to work through, but I'm confident you can."

She laughed nervously. "Fat chance of that happening now sweetie. I mean look at me, a middle-aged woman, no one in my life, and not very damn likely anyone will be any time soon. And on top of that, there's no assurance I'll ever be able to get through that mental block, and truly enjoy an intimate relationship with anyone ever again."

"Hey...you said fuck! It's a start!" I smiled at her. Once again making her laugh, and making her squirm in her seat just a little.

"I need some more lemonade," she said suddenly standing. "It really is hot in here. Can I get you another?"

"Yes...thank you," I said handing her my glass. She returned a minute or two later, and I noticed as she leaned forward just a little, giving it to me, she had undone one more button on the summer dress she was wearing. One more, and she might just as well take it off. She again caught me looking, though I made it obvious that I was, actually commenting. "You really do have nice looking breasts, from what I can see of them of course," I told her now looking up into her eyes again. She was blushing just a little, but then leaned forward a bit more, this time giving me a quick brief kiss on the forehead.

"Thank you. It's been a long time since anyone's told me that. Not like I've given anyone an opportunity to do so...it's just been a very long time."

She sat down again, sipping on her drink for a moment, the two of us once again just looking at one another in silence.

"Well...so now you know my whole sordid story, my past. Are you shocked by what I told you Brian, especially knowing me all these years?"

"No, not really. I mean I'm sorry you went through what you did yes. But offended, or shocked? No. I think I've always felt that there was something about you down deep, just beneath that surface of shyness, even professed inhibitions that I never fully accepted was the real you. I still think, the real you, is that same sexy, uninhibited erotic woman just waiting to come out and play again."

Once again she laughed, this time crossing her legs, giving me the quickest, briefest glimpse up her summer dress. I saw the light yellow color of the panties she had on, though again my look was brief as she re-crossed her legs again properly.

"If I didn't know better, I'd swear you were flirting with me."

"Who says I'm not Carol? Truth is...you're definitely an MILF! That's for damn sure."

"MILF? What's a MILF? Never heard that term used before. What's it mean?"

"Mother I'd like to fuck," I said simply looking directly at her. I watched her eyes grow wide upon hearing that, saw her tongue come out and absentmindedly lick her lips briefly trying to give them moisture as her mouth had obviously gone dry.

"Ah, well at least now I know what that means," she said obviously skirting the issue, trying to change the subject, though keeping things still intimate between us. "Anyway...I told you my big deep dark secret. You promised to tell me yours."

I nodded. I'd already decided what I was going to share with her. Which was a big fat lie of course. But I'd already made a pretty good assumption she'd believe it, accept it...and perhaps even, enjoy hearing it. It was a gamble for me at this point of course, I had no way of knowing what she'd think when I told her. But by now, I was reasonably certain, she was almost as aroused as I was.

"My secret has a little something to do with you. Back in the day..." I said using her terminology, seeing her smile at that when I said it. "When I'd come over here, hang around, waiting for Jerry to come home, or even when he was here. I'd sometimes sneak into your bathroom, rummage through your dirty clothes hamper, and 'borrow' a pair of your panties," I said with as much of a straight face as I could muster. "I always brought them back of course...afterwards."

I wasn't sure at first how she'd respond to hearing that. But after what she'd told me, I figured I needed to give her something that was equally obscene, though a bit more personal even.

I actually saw her smile then, and then broader a moment after that. "Well...that answers that question!" She now laughed. "You did?"

"I did. What question?"

"I always assumed..." she laughed again. "So, you're telling me...it was YOU then who was using my dirty panties to masturbate with."

"I did...and I was yes," though what she had now said suddenly dawned on me. Jerry!

"I don't know whether to be relieved, or surprised," she giggled flatly. "All this time, I've been thinking it was my own son who was confiscating my panties, when in fact...all this time, it had really been you! I almost approached him once regarding it. But after my own experience, I thought better against doing it. I didn't want him scarred for life, or dealing with something that I later decided was perhaps a normal, natural thing that most young men probably did. Even if it was my panties he was doing it too. I am curious though..." she then added.

"About?"

"Did you...well, did you ever take any of Jenny's panties as well?"

I figured I owed Jerry one, though he'd probably never know it. I even blushed a little, cementing the effect. "A few times...yes. I did. But to be perfectly honest about it Carol, I much preferred using yours to pleasure myself with. I liked them better, and quite frankly...they made me a whole lot hornier. You tended to juice a lot," I added, gambling once again, not sure if she really did...or if what I'd just said might actually disgust her in some way.

All she did was smile again, though blushing herself now. "I do tend to do that whenever I'm really aroused. Hate to admit it, but I very often had to change panties once or twice a day."

"I know," I said winking at her. "Trust me, I know."

Though I had secretly hoped for a lot more to happen, things had pretty much run the full gauntlet here. Her nervousness suddenly reappearing, and with it, her inhibitions again. She fidgeted in her seat, once again changing the subject. This time, entirely.

"Well, we really got sidetracked there didn't we?" She said nervously now, back peddling. "We're supposed to be talking about the University itself, why you might want, or not want to attend there, not talking about my secret past, or yours either for that matter," she now added in that Mrs. Davis, now Ms. Peterson, tone of voice she once used around me. It was time to go. But I now knew we needed another session together, and I needed the time to recharge my ability. But I wasn't about to leave with things quite on this level again either. But I had just the reason, a very good one, for putting it back there again before I left.

"Actually Carol, I need to get going. But what I would like, is to come back, perhaps on Sunday even? Maybe we could discuss things again. I've enjoyed this, and frankly...enjoyed sharing with you, finally being able to share with you MY big naughty secret. You're right...it's sort of cleansing, finally being able to do that in a way. I always did sort of feel bad, felt guilty about stealing your panties, even though I always did bring them back." 'At least I hope I did,' I thought to myself.

"Not always," she giggled again slipping back some. "And in fact, I could now box your ears for taking one pair of my favorite panties that you never did return."

"Oh? And which ones were those?"

"My red silks. Always wondered what happened to those. That was the missing pair that almost prompted me to speak to Jerry about."

"Oh yeah...those. Sorry about that. I rather enjoyed those too. So much so, I did decide to keep them, that pair anyway. I think I sort of ruined them anyway. Wasn't sure everything would wash out, or allow them to look the way they should have after that. More than happy to buy you a new pair though!"

"Maybe...I'll just have you work it off, doing things for me around here. I could in fact, use a little help these days."
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