Drama Being Beth

My video with Hank was a huge success -- we got over two hundred dollars in donations. Comments were way higher than usual, too. By now I'd gotten used to some of the more lewd and rude comments but even so some of the ones people left on this video caught me by surprise:

"Beth is such a hot little slut would love to fuck her!"

"oh man hope they do more bbc I love watching white girls get plowed by big black cocks"

"girl loved that hot black cock and cum plz do more and Jamie too"

I had loved doing that video and clearly so did our fans. Hank had been charmingly embarrassed afterwards and had spent a very long time checking I was okay with how it went. I'd told him very emphatically that I was great with how it went. I'd never been fucked that hard and that well and it was all I could do to tell him he could do it again whenever he wanted. Because really, he could have, as far as I was concerned.

Jamie was ecstatic as she knew far better than me that the video was going to be a big hit, although she told me later that this was the first time she ever felt a little jealous. Not over Hank fucking me but she definitely wanted to try the Tonguemaster, she'd told me, especially after seeing him in action. I felt a little bad but also a little proud; in one, small way I was a little more experienced than Jamie.

For me though, the biggest takeaway was for the first time in my entire life I thought about anal sex.

I had never before in my life fantasized about anal sex. My whole life anal sex had been something that I guessed gay guys did and maybe porn actors did for money, but not for pleasure. Well, I was a porn actress now, but even so the thought had only vaguely entered my mind and only then in the form of 'well no matter what I'll never do that!'.

Then Hank came along. For days afterwards I kept replaying that moment when he very gently pressed the tip of his penis over my tightly closed sphincter. It had been scary -- for a brief moment I'd worried Hank might go too far. But there was a small part of me that wished he had. I mean, it was scary - really scary, but exciting, too. I didn't know how it would feel -- I assumed it would hurt but there was something about the idea of having a penis in there that excited me.

I knew there were... well, 'things' you should do to prepare but apart from lube, I wasn't sure what they were. So I set to googling.

When I first moved to Feltville I didn't bring a computer -- I'd never had one of my own, I'd shared two or three PCs with my brothers growing up and only one laptop which they kept when I moved. I'd thought of buying one but instead Jamie gave me her old one, which I'd used to take up more and more of my share in running our website; mostly answering fan comments and monitoring traffic.

But now I sat down and googled advice on how to have anal sex. I found guides, forums of people giving tips and personal experience.

It scared the bejeezus out of me. But I took it all in, determined to at least know what it all entailed before saying yay or nay. I was just starting to look at buttplugs -- small ones -- when my phone rang. My oldest brother Jason's name came up as the contact.

"Hej Jase!"

"Hi Beth! How's life over in Feltville?"

"Oh same old, same old." I said as I scrolled past various sized and shaped sex toys for my porn business. "And Botaka?"

"Oh you know. Nothing ever really changes here."

"I know." I said and laughed. Jason had never been too keen on moving; he didn't really see the point.

"So, what you up to?" I scrolled past a neon-pink latex buttplug marketed as being good for beginners and briefly felt a surge of excitement at the thought of it entering me.

"Not much. Work stuff."

"Work stuff?" he scoffed. "What, being a waitress involves paper work now or something?"

"Ah no, erm -- I'm helping a friend with some of her work stuff." I should ask Jamie what kind of lube she recommends. I thought as I went on to look at the many, many types on offer.

"Alright. And work is good?" he asked.

"Yeah, fine."

"Making good money?"

"Sure." I answered, noncommittally.

"Cool, cool." There was a pause. "I bet it can be hard managing on a waitress' wage."

"I get by." I said.

"Good. Good. Well, anyway, just wanted to drop a call, tell you how everyone's doing." He then proceeded to tell me how my folks were and the rest of my siblings. Jason was a few years older than me: My parents had him then they'd paused while they saved up money to buy a house. I came next and then my five other brothers in quick succession. Jason still lived at home and I suspected it slightly grated my folks, especially what with me out of the house at twenty and my oldest younger brother Brian hoping to move out soon at only nineteen. What was keeping Jason, I often wondered.

"Well, that's about it. Oh and mom wishes you'd call more." Jason finally wrapped up.

"Of course she does." I said. "Tell everyone I miss them but I really should go." We said goodbye and hung up and I eyed my online basket. I'd get lube later, after checking with Jamie, but I ordered the buttplug as well as a vibrator that looked good. Not that I knew, these were my first ever sex toys, after all. As for the other 'stuff' well I supposed I'd better find a pharmacy. No rush though -- yeah I was excited to start experimenting but even my short research told me to go to slow.​