Fantasy Making of a Starship Captain

Everything looked right at the engineering console, but didn't feel right. Something... about the computer interface. Mike did some rapid checking. He found a new file he didn't recognize in the main drive routine, and opened it. His eyes grew wide as he read it.

And then deleted it.

"We have only four minutes left!" Joanna cried.

"It's not going to work," said Allyson.

"It is going to work," said Taylor, coming onto the bridge with his chin up and chest held high. "Sophie, activate the drive again."

Sophie pressed the button.

The Potemkin Village shook, and shuddered, and shuddered some more, and then the ship started to move!

The control systems burned out a minute later, but not before the ship was thrown clear....

"What happened?" Sophie asked afterwards, when they were in private.

"I found an anomalous subroutine in the drive program which prevented the drive from starting," Taylor said.

"How did it get there?" Sophie asked.

"I don't know," said Taylor.

"Sabotage?"

"Yes," said Taylor promptly.

Sophie raised her left eyebrow. "Fascinating."

They all found a big surprise waiting for them at dinner.

Allyson was dressed in civilian clothing at dinner, going from table to table. And she had luggage.

"Going somewhere?" Taylor inquired, when she came by his table.

"I'm leaving," said Allyson.

"You're leaving?" said Cherry.

"I RFD'd," said Allyson.

"This late in the game?" said Cherry, sounding surprised.

"I should have realized it sooner," said Allyson. "The Survey Service is not for me."

"But... what about the proud tradition of Harshbarger women, going back to your grandmother's line?" Taylor asked.

Allyson's eyes narrowed, as if she thought she was being mocked. "The Service has changed. It's become more of a technical service, a service of coach drivers."

"Coach drivers?" said Andrea.

"You move things and people from one place to another. That needs to be done, I suppose, but I want something more... fulfilling. The World Government has approved my transfer to the Diplomatic Corps. They've even given me credit for my time at the Academy."

"How nice for you," said Cherry.

"I'll miss you all," said Allyson. She turned to Taylor. "Mike, I'm going to be going home before I go to my new assignment. Would you like me to drop by your parents and tell them how well you're doing?"

"No, that's not necessary, Allyson."

"But Mike, I wouldn't mind-"

"Goodbye, Allyson," said Taylor firmly.

Allyson blinked, and looked startled, as if she had been slapped. Then she picked up her virtual valise and left.

"I don't believe she RFD'ed," said Cherry darkly. "I think they dropped her."

"Now why would they do that?" said Taylor.

"She doesn't work and play well with others," said Cherry. "And I think the Service finally realized it."

Taylor shrugged, but matched gazes with Sophie, who raised an eyebrow.

They had made it.

Allyson was the last one to leave (or be dropped from?) the program.

Their training continued.

Time passed.

As they approached the end of their third year at the Academy, they all knew that they were going to make it. All they were waiting for was their assignments.

But first came the Academy Ball.

Taylor looked proudly in the mirror. He was dressed in his formal cadet dress uniform, with fancy stitching and a formal white jacket with white epaulettes on the shoulder. As he looked in the mirror, Cherry, who was similarly dressed, grabbed him from behind. "You look so wonderful. Like a Survey Service Captain. I'm going to be with the most dashing man at the ball, and everyone is going to be insanely jealous."

Taylor looked at her, and saw she was serious. He leaned forward, and they embraced and kissed.

Taylor danced with Cherry on the dance floor. She looked gorgeous. There was something distinctly sexy about a pretty girl wearing a formal military uniform. Cherry's dark hair was especially silky and shiny. Her cheeks shone brightly in the ballroom lights. Her slender lips were glued into a smile, and her dark eyes were full of adoration.

Adoration for him. Taylor could see the reflection of himself in them as they danced. She seemed totally spellbound by him. He felt incredibly lucky. He couldn't believe that this was real. Against all odds, he had made it to the Academy, and was now about to graduate.

And meanwhile, he was dancing with the prettiest girl in the hall.

Taylor felt the eyes of others on them. "You're so beautiful," he said. "They're all staring at you."

"No, my dear," she said. "They're staring at us!"

Cherry may not have been wrong. Andrea Farber and Paula Kenobi and Joanna Martin all had their own dates, but he could see, even as they danced, that they were staring at them.

At him?

But it wasn't the kind of stares that Taylor was used to. Not the cruel, mocking stares. Not the stares at something odd, something to be quarantined, avoided.

It was stares of admiration. Even stares of desire.

Taylor was sure of it when Andrea Farber came and asked permission to cut in. Andrea looked beautiful in her dress outfit. The redhead's large, firm breasts stood out prominently. Her thick red hair perfectly framed her green eyes and brilliant smile. Cherry gave her a look of pure loathing but said, "Of course, Andrea." She made a face at Taylor and stepped away.

"Mike," Andrea said, as they danced, and that one word said it all. She said it as a gasp, as if she were experiencing extreme pleasure, as she danced with a broad smile on her lips. "You're looking so... officerly tonight," she said, struggling to find the right words. She looked at his hair, so neatly combed, his masculine face, his broad shoulders, his green eyes... they all took her breath away.

"You're looking good too Andrea," said Taylor, smiling at her. He was startled when he saw her shudder visibly. Could he really have this effect on women?

"I'm guessing that we're never going to see each other again after graduation," she said, looking up at him with those beautiful eyes. What was she trying to tell him?

"It's possible we might get posted to the same ship."

"But unlikely," said Andrea, making a face as they danced. "Very unlikely."

"True," said Taylor. "We... we can keep in touch by holocom."

"Yeah. That... that would be great," said Andrea, making a face.

And to Taylor's surprise, he saw her sniffling. "Andrea, what's wrong?"

"Nothing. I... I have something in my eye. Excuse me, Mike." She went and hurried off to the bathroom.

Cherry came back and resumed dancing with him again, but Andrea had broken the ice. Joanna Martin asked to cut in, and Paula Kenobi, and several of the other girls in Taylor's class. Taylor saw Sophie Astor, standing by the snack table, looking forlorn, and felt sorry for her, and asked her to dance.

"Why?" Sophie asked.

"Why not?" said Taylor.

Sophie lifted an eyebrow. "A compelling riposte."

Taylor was very surprised to learn that Sophie was a graceful dancer. He would have expected that she would be awkward, fumbling. But she moved smoothly to the music, following Taylor's lead. She had a blank expression on her face.

"You disapprove of this event," said Taylor.

Sophie lifted an eyebrow again. "I neither approve, nor disapprove. I note it."

Taylor's eyes narrowed. "You disapprove."

"It serves no purpose," said Sophie. "It does not teach us anything."

"Is there no enjoyment in life for you, Sophie? Is everything about having a utilitarian purpose?" Taylor asked, as he led her to the right. She followed easily.

"Of course there is enjoyment," said Sophie. "The enjoyment of figuring out an architectural pattern. Of discovering a motivation. Of seeing how a group works and interacts together."

"What about the joys of contact with people. With a man, perhaps?" Taylor asked. "What about the joy of feeling my arm around your waist, of feeling my hand intertwined with yours, of looking into my eyes, of feeling the music as you dance?"

"I... I note them," said Sophie, and this was the first time Taylor had ever seen her hesitant.

"Well, then I'm extremely glad to be a minor notation in one of your mental files."

And then Sophie did something totally unexpected. She laughed! She actually laughed, a small, dry chuckle. She smiled for a brief moment, looking like a totally different person, before her face went blank again. "At times you are moderately amusing, Michael."

"I've never received higher praise," said Taylor.

During a break, Taylor mixed with some of the faculty along the sidelines. Commandant Renton was there, dressed in his Survey Service finest, his uniform decked with ribbons, one of which, Taylor was sure, must relate to all the lives he had saved on the Arcturus. As Taylor walked up to him, Renton smiled.

"Ah, Taylor."

Taylor looked surprised. How had Renton known it was him?

"You're quite an accomplished dancer," said Renton.

"Sir?"

"At least, that's what everyone tells me," said Renton. "You've changed, Taylor. Everyone I talk to says it. When you came here you had skills, you had ability. But you didn't have the confidence. Now you do. I predict you will be an excellent Survey Service officer... if you don't stumble."

"I'll try not to, sir," said Taylor. He realized that Renton was right. Gone was the shy boy who had entered the Academy. The stain of what Sister Audra had done to him was gone. He had become a different person now.

"We've won!" said Ambition.

"We did it!" said Love the Survey Service, giving him a hug.

"Just look at us!" said Self Image, staring at himself in the mirror. Mike was big, tall, handsome, and determined.

"Congratulations," said Inadequacy, smiling broadly.

"I didn't think we'd see you here," said Ambition.

"Nonsense! I'm as happy for Mike as the rest of you."

"I'm sure," said Ambition.

"Really," said Inadequacy. "After all these years, you don't really understand what I'm all about, do you?"

"I understand exactly what you're all about," said Ambition.

"No. I wanted Mike to succeed as much as the rest of you. But I feared he couldn't succeed, and I wanted to protect him from failure. I'm so glad I was wrong. I'm happy for him. Really, I am."

Everyone stared at Inadequacy. He smiled back at them innocently.

"Sir, can I ask you a question?" Taylor asked the Commandant.

"Certainly."

"Were... were you an observer at the survival course on the days I participated?"

Renton gave a chuckle.

"What's so funny, sir?"

"Well, Taylor, I don't know if you've noticed or not, but I'm blind."

Cherry rescued him from that awkward moment by pulling him back on the dance floor. "Have you finished dancing with every female cadet, Michael?"

"Every cadet? I think I missed a few-"

"Which one did you like best?" she asked.

"Sophie," said Michael promptly. "I think day and night about Sophie Astor."

He saw the hint of a grin start to appear on Cherry's face. "What's with this jealousy? I saw you dancing with Tom Landry and Henry Marcus."

"It's not the same thing," she said, making a face.

"When the shoe's on the other foot, it never is," said Taylor.

"You're infuriating, you know that," she said.

"Is that a nice thing?" Taylor asked.

"I haven't decided," she said, squinting at him. Then she paused. "Mike, I have something to tell you."

"Oh oh," said Taylor.

"No, it's good news," she said, even as they continued dancing.

"What is it?"

"I think we're going to be posted on the same ship!" She was all smiles now.

"What?" said Taylor. "How can you know that?"

"I spoke to Lieutenant Kiley in the assignments office. I told him what a good team you and I were."

"And on that basis, he assigned us to the same ship?'

"Nooo.... Not exactly," said Cherry, looking away evasively.

"You flirted with him," said Taylor.

"I might have, just a little." And now she was smiling broadly. "All right, I flirted with him shamelessly."

"Should I be jealous?" Taylor asked.

"Not when you see the results! We're both going to be posted on the Sulaka."

The Sulaka was a Survey Service destroyer. "Are you sure?"

"Not exactly. He said he would try his best. But I'm confident he'll pull it off. Isn't that great, Mike? We're going to be together!" She frantically searched his eyes. "You're not excited, are you? This isn't what you want? Have I made a terrible-"

Her voice was suddenly cut off as Mike gave her an incredible kiss, right there in the center of the ballroom. People turned to watch and then the cadets started to clap. When it was over, Cherry was breathless, and her face was red.

"Oh, Mike," she breathed.

"Hey there," said Galactic Integrity.

"Hello again," said Lieutenant Kiley's Survey Service Ideals.

The first time Kiley's Survey Service Ideals had met Galactic Integrity, he had been startled. Previously he had only interacted with other motivations in Kiley's mind, or with others on the Survey Service Ideals plane.

But this newcomer had been a complete stranger to him. Kiley sensed it immediately. He had introduced himself as something called "Galactic Integrity". Kiley's Survey Service Ideals didn't know what that meant, but over the course of the past year, "Galactic Integrity" had helped him over and over, pointing out flaws in cadets who should be dropped from the program. Kiley's Survey Service Ideals had slowly begun to trust his new and mysterious ally.

"I want to talk with you about a certain cadet named Michael Taylor," said Galactic Integrity.

Taylor. The name sounded familiar. Wasn't there a woman in his office last week--oh yes. "Yes, he's slated to join the Sulaka."

"I think he'd be better suited for the Charleston," said Galactic Integrity.

"The Charleston? He'll be chewed up and spit out. We've had such bad experiences sending cadets there, that we're thinking of stopping entirely."

"Taylor's a bad seed," said Galactic Integrity.

"Taylor? He has some of the finest scores-"

"Scores don't tell the whole story. He has a fatal flaw, one that will emerge at the worst times. You have to weed him out, for the safety of the Service. Trust me, put him on the Charleston, and you'll see for yourself."

"I already promised his girlfriend to put him on the Sulaka."

"Your name is Survey Service Ideals, not Pleasing Someone's Girlfriend, is it not?"

Suddenly, Survey Service Ideals was embarrassed.

"Trust me. Every other bit of advice I've given you has been right, hasn't it?"

That was true. Galactic Integrity had helped him weed more than one flawed cadet out of the Academy. Survey Service Ideals paused, thinking about it, and nodded. "All right."

"You won't regret it," said Galactic Integrity. "Trust me, you're doing a great thing not just for the Service, but the entire galaxy."

It was the proudest day of Taylor's life.

Taylor had felt the greatest thrill of his life when he had gotten dressed that morning. Gone was the drab white cadet uniform. For the first time was decked out in the black and blue and silver of the Survey Service. He actually gasped when he saw himself in the uniform. He always wanted to be a Survey Service Captain; now he actually looked the part.

It was a warm morning in June in Pensacola as Taylor stood in front of the awards platform. The audience was filled with family members of all the cadet class. One by one each cadet was called up to be commissioned by Commandant Renton. When Taylor's turn came, he marched up to the stage. He saw an aide whisper something into Commandant's Renton's ear. Then Renton smiled and said, "Ah, Taylor! You're looking well. A little tired, though. Didn't you get enough sleep?"

"Not nearly enough, sir," said Taylor.

"Well, you can sleep well after this," said Renton. "Are you ready to become a probationary officer in the United Survey Service?"

"Yes sir!"

"Then let us begin."

And seconds later, Taylor found himself repeating the following words: "I, Michael Tiberius Taylor, having been appointed to the probationary rank of Ensign in the United Survey Service, am ready to fulfill all the rights and responsibilities therein."

Michael looked out into the crowd. He saw his Mother, Sara, weeping.

"I affirm that I will support and defend the Planet Earth against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear truth faith and allegiance to the same-"

He saw his father, staring at him, looking incredibly proud. To his side was Darden, and his sister Val, who was chewing on something hard.

"-and that I will faithfully serve and discharge the duties of the office upon which I am about to enter-"

Out of the corner of his eye Taylor thought he saw Hal, sitting in the front row of the audience, smiling at him. But when he looked directly at him, there was no one there.

And then Michael stood there as Renton clipped Ensign bars on his shoulders, and gave him his silver eagles, and the cadets and their parents broke out into thunderous applause. "Michael! Michael!" he heard people cry.

It was the proudest moment of his life.

When he came down from the stage first his mother hugged him, and then his father, whispering in his ear, "I'm so proud of you son", and then Darden actually saluted him, but no longer mockingly; and 14 year old Val, sucking on a lollipop, gave him a thumbs up and a grin.

"Mike, I cannot believe it. I have told everyone I know. We are all so tremendously proud of you," said Sara, smiling at him. "You look so marvelous! You look like an Admiral!"

"A Captain!" said Darden, with a gleam in his eye. "You're going to be a great Survey Service Captain, isn't that right, Mikey?"

Taylor smiled and nodded. He found it interesting that if Darden had said the exact same words to him five years ago, they would have had a fist fight; but now, instead, they just embraced, and Darden whispered in his ear, "Good job, kid."

And then Taylor felt eyes on him, and he looked up, and told his parents, "Excuse me for a moment, please."

He walked over to Sergeant Chappie, who was wearing his own dress uniform, which was decked with ribbons and medals. "Sergeant Chappie," said Taylor, saluting.

Chappie frowned. "You don't salute me anymore, Taylor. I salute you." And then, to Taylor's astonishment, he did.

"Thank you... Sergeant." For a moment, Taylor was speechless.

"Well, spit it out boy, we don't have all day," said Chappie.

"I... I just wanted to thank you, Sergeant," said Taylor.

Chappie looked amused. "You wanted to thank me? For what? For pushing you to give me your RFD every way I could think of? For driving you to exhaustion and making you do pushups in the rain? For making you run miles and miles day and night?"

"Yes, for all of it, Sir. I mean, Sergeant," said Taylor, seeing the expression his face.

Chappie gave him an unreadable look. "Then you're welcome, Taylor. I'm going to be expecting a lot from you. My small Chinese ears and even smaller Chinese eyes will be watching your exploits over the coming years. Don't disappoint me."

"I won't, sir."

"Now get out of here. You have better places to go, and better people to be with." And he turned and walked away.

Taylor went to hug Joanna Martin, and met her parents, who were Aussies like her. Then he congratulated Andrea Farber, and met her parents, and had a tearful goodbye where he and Andrea hugged, and wished her well. And he spoke to several other cadets before he came to Cherry.

Cherry, who had a glum look on her face.

"What's wrong?" Taylor asked.

"The assignment list just came out," said Cherry.

"So?" said Taylor, feeling his stomach tensing.

"I got the Sulaka," said Cherry.

"Just like you planned," said Taylor.

"But you didn't," said Cherry. He saw tears in her eyes. "Michael, they're putting you on the Charleston!"

He hugged her tightly as she wept.

Dinner with his parents was tinged with sadness. He tried not to show it, but he could tell that his mother realized something was wrong. But he maintained a brave face, and laughed and joked with them.

After dinner, he went to Cherry's quarters. He could see she had been crying. Her eyes were red, and her hair was messed up. She was wearing casual exercise clothes.

"Did you have dinner with your parents?" Taylor asked, sitting down on her bed.

Cherry nodded.

"They must have been very proud of you," said Taylor, putting an arm around her.

She nodded again.

"Cherry, I-"

She put a hand over his mouth. "Michael, don't. Don't say a thing." She stared at him, and the tears were building up again. "Just make love to me, Michael. Make love to me like there's no tomorrow."

Michael nodded and started to remove her clothing.

At first he made love to Cherry gingerly, tenderly. But she quickly signaled she wanted the opposite, and so the lovemaking turned hard. As Michael thrust into her, ramming in and out of her with two pounds of solid piston-like love, Cherry was crying hysterically. It was a little odd to be violently making love to a crying woman. But he could tell that she liked it, and when she climaxed, and cried out, she curled up into his arms, and settled into an uneasy sleep.

The next morning, when she woke up in his arms, Cherry said, "Michael? I've been thinking."

"What?" said Taylor.

"I... I could resign my commission. We could get married."

"Resign your commission? Just as you're starting your career?"

"Or...." She looked up at him with doubtful eyes. "You could resign your commission and marry me."

Ah ha.

Taylor hugged her tightly. "Cherry, this is what we were both meant to be. Survey Service officers. We can't deny that. It's a big galaxy, but not a tremendously sized one. We can still talk over holocom-"

"Talk over holocom," she said dully.

"And still meet from time to time."

"Quickies," she said, equally dully.

"This... this is what life is," said Taylor.

"Life sucks," said Cherry emphatically.

Taylor went to breakfast alone. Cherry wasn't hungry. He sat down next to Sophie. Sophie surprised him by asking him a question, which, for her, was quite unusual.

"How is Cherry?"

"She's fine," Taylor lied. "How are you?"

"Unchanged," said Sophie. "I have been assigned to the Matador."

"A good ship," said Taylor.

"Not like yours."

"Not like mine?"

"I've done some research on the Charleston, the ship you've been assigned to," said Sophie.

Taylor leaned forward. "Now, why would you do that? First you ask about Cherry, and now this. Do you feel some emotional concern for my well being, Sophie?"

Sophie blinked twice. "No. Simple curiosity."

"I see," said Taylor. "And what did your simple curiosity uncover?"

"Four of the last five cadets who have been assigned to the Charleston failed to graduate."

A cold chill went down Taylor's back.

The fact is, that he wasn't really an Ensign now; none of them were. They were probationary Ensigns, their promotion being contingent on actually completing their training cruise successfully. It was common for a cadet to fail once in a while, but for four of the last five to fail?

That could only think there was something wrong with the Charleston. Something very wrong.

Why would the Academy have sent him there? Everyone from the Commandant down seemed to hold him in the highest regard.

"Don't worry about it," said Ambition. "We came to the Academy as a boy and left as a man. Nothing can keep us down."

Taylor stuck out his chest. "Don't worry about it, Sophie. I'm sure everything will be all right."

She just stared at him, with those expressionless green eyes.​